Archive for March, 2010

01
Mar
10

Gun Play

Just thought I’d put that right out there. I should probably stick a WARNING right here: This post talks about GUNS. and SEX. at the SAME TIME. in a mostly NON-EXPLICIT theoretical manner. If this is a huge problem for you, skip this entry. If not, read on, because this was kind of a breakthrough realization for me.

FWIW: It still even has the orange safety tip.

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It’s not the uncertainty that turns me on — quite the opposite. If there was any uncertainty, I wouldn’t play like that with the Captain. Is it loaded? Is it empty? Irrelevant — I trust him to not shoot me. The fear is just a visceral, visual reaction to the gun-shaped piece of metal and plastic.

It’s the balance between absolute trust and irrational terror, standing perfectly balanced on the ledge between two precipices, that makes it arousing. Trust by itself is nice, fear by itself is unpleasant; it’s their combination that turns me on.

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I didn’t know whether he had just emptied the clip or filled it, but the loaded/not questions didn’t even enter my mind. I was just doing, just reacting. I don’t know if I can put into words what I was thinking, but I know I liked it and I want to do it again.

There may or may not be strings here to form v. content and/or romantic-grotesque. I’m tempted to expand into theory but… I think I need more practice first :3

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